Day Job...

D-Buttersnaps: What do you do for a living?
Cooper: I'm a Side-tracker. I'm really good at my job.

Website Updates...

"I hope that content migration becomes a touchstone in the arc of your career." -- Burning Man

Judgement...

"You will have to bring in this boyfriend of yours so we can judge him and you." -- Highly Suspeck

Cake...

"We are going to eat cake, because that makes everything better." -- Fedora

Marketing...

"Remember, marketing is not real life." -- Burning Man

People Watching...

"Budda's got a girlfriend." -- Cooper

Processes...

"It's important to remember that we're still hung up in our underwear." -- Burning Man

In the Dark...

"Anyone who wants to go into the copy room in the dark, just let me know." Burning Man

Riches...

"You can still be an idiot and be rich." -- Highly Suspeck

Speech Development...

"It's the State of the College. You gotta put a lot of stuff in there. Like a Thanksgiving Dinner speech." -- Highly Suspeck

Hugs...

"That's what I need right now. A big man-hug." -- Almond Joey

Time Management...

"Time Management Workshop? I don't have TIME!!!" -- Highly Suspeck

People on Campus...

Highly Suspeck: That guy sounded like a bull in the bathroom.
D-Buttersnaps: Better than a china shop.

Work Requests...

"Drop everything you're doing and get into my office." -- Almond Joey

Terms...

"Volt, Vocus and Provost. One's a survey and one's a man." -- Medicine Woman

List Hygine...

Burning Man: You can dedupe.
VIP: Can you dedead?

Lost and Found...

"St. Jude is Hopeless Causes. That's why it resonates with me." -- VIP

Planets...

Queen Bee: Planets shrink?
Crafty Sven: Yeah. That's why it's not a Pluto.

Recycling...

Burning Man: I had the recycling police on my street this morning.
Crafty Sven: Looking in your cans?
Burning Man: Excuse me??

Measurements...

"Do you still have your tape measure? Will you measure me?" -- Burning Man

Supplies...

"Yuck! I'm taking this home to wash it. I don't know where it's been." -- Curly Q

Students...

"I realize now that we don't recruit students, we just wear them down." -- Almond Joey

Job Responsibility...

"I'm just the Dean. What do I know?" -- Anonymous

Underwriting...

"Underwriting is the 'plankton' of our enrollment efforts." -- Hot Pink Gym Shoes

Right and Wrong...

"I hate that I'm right ALL the time." -- Almond Joey

Growing Up...

"I'm not much of an adult." -- Cooper

New Babies...

"A new baby is more intense than a chihuahua." -- Burning Man